NFL week 1: Final results ATS
See? Remember what NFLbets said about betting week 1 NFL games? About the high-risk of throwing money at so many unknowns? Think about how much, in 60 minutes’ worth of game time, we learned about the Atlanta Falcons, Arizona Cardinals, Buffalo Bills, Cleveland Browns, Detroit Lions, Houston Texans, Kansas City Chiefs, New Orleans Saints, New York Jets, Oakland Raiders San Francisco 49ers, and the Khalil Mack-era Chicago Bears – many confirmed what we suspected, some surprised positively, all had narratives changed immediately.
Below runs a full list of results for week 1 in the only fashion NFLbets really cares about, i.e. adjusted for the point spread; all results listed in boldface indicate games in which the SU and ATS results differed. Snarky comments courtesy Os Davis.
• Philadelphia Eagles 17, Atlanta Falcons 12. How Steve Sarkisian has not been held accountable for his crimes by the people of Atlanta is a mystery.
• Cleveland Browns 25½, Pittsburgh Steelers 21. In the post-game, Browns defensive coordinator Gregg Williams could only say, “That isn’t the way I taught them to tie.”
• Cincinnati Bengals 33, Indianapolis Colts 21. What’s gonna be fun? Betting against the certain-to-be overrated Bengals for the next three or four weeks.
• Miami Dolphins 27, Tennessee Titans 19. We’re fairly certain someone somewhere was watching this game, even after the 12-hour weather delay.
• Minnesota Vikings 18, San Francisco 49ers 16. Jimmy Garoppolo may be the highest-risk, highest-reward quarterback since Brett Favre, the all-time leader in interceptions thrown.
• New England Patriots 20½, Houston Texans 20. Sheesh, the slippery DeShaun Watson was sacked three teams by a defense with no pass rush? How bad is this Houston offensive line?
• Tampa Bay Buccaneers 48, New Orleans Saints 30. NFLbets can’t wait to bet against the Buccaneers this week: They’re +3 versus the Eagles? Bwah ha ha ha haaaaa!
• Jacksonville Jaguars 17½, New York Giants 15. Eli Manning interception count: 1 down (a pick-six, no less!), 19 to go.
• Baltimore Ravens 39½, Buffalo Bills 3. Aaaaaaand 0-16 is definitely on the table for the Bills.
• Kansas City Chiefs 38, Los Angeles Chargers 24½. Don’t all you folks who covered the Chargers to win the AFC West rather than the Chiefs at +300 or so feel a little foolish right now…?
• Denver Broncos 24, Seattle Seahawks 24. So maybe these teams will score some points this season, after all.
• Washington 24, Arizona Cardinals 4. So are the Cardinals the Bills of the NFC or are the Bills the Cardinals of the AFC?
• Carolina Panthers 13, Dallas Cowboys 8. Total yards gained by Dak Prescott and Ezekiel Elliott: 253. Dallas Cowboys total offensive yardage: 232. Points scored by Prescott and Elliott: 8. Points scored by rest of team: 0. This could be a long season, Dallas…
• Chicago Bears 23, Green Bay Packers 17½. If this is the worst the Bears will see this season, they’ll be better than Chiacgo fans would have dared dream prior to the season.
• New York Jets 48, Detroit Lions 10. Here’s the list of coordinators who left Bill Belichick’s Patriots to be successful elsewhere: . Now is the Matt Patricia bandwagon just about empty yet?
• Los Angeles Rams 28½, Oakland Raiders 13. Chucky may not need batteries, but he does need a lot more than what's currently in Oakland…